With great access comes….

Landschlacht, Switzerland, Monday 28 December 2020

Yesterday the wife and I went on a winter walk in the Flumserberg region of Canton St. Gallen, a 10-kilometer walk in -5°C weather.

Surprisingly, more people outside walking, skiing, sledding than I expected during this second Swiss lockdown.

Unsurprisingly, a lot fewer people than one would normally find during these six days of limbo between Christmas and New Year’s, as the ski lodges that remain open to serve food only allow takeaway.

A whole tale could be (and hopefully will be) told about our weekend (26 – 27 December) in the Walenstadt – Flumserberg area, but I find myself feeling annoyed this morning at a few folks we met during our walks.

This annoyance was sparked into life (and words) again as I read this morning collected copies of old Canadian newspapers I bought in January in preparation of writing another post about my travels in Canada.

New York City, Thursday 8 January 2020

Denying he was biased, the judge in Harvey Weinstein’s rape trial refused to remove himself from the high profile case, rejecting an accusation by the former film producers’ lawyers.

Above: Harvey Weinstein

“I have in no way prejudged this case,” Justice James Burke told Weinstein’s lawyers.

“I am going to great lengths to afford your client a fair trial.“

Above: Justice James Burke

Weinstein (67) has pleaded not guilty to charges of assaulting two women and faces life in prison if convicted on the most serious charge: predatory sexual assault.

His trial began on Monday (6 January 2020) and could last up to two months.

(It ended on 24 February.

Weinstein was sentenced to 23 years in prison on 11 March.)

Above: Rose McGowan, 2018, wrote on Twitter that she told Amazon Studios head Roy Price that Weinstein had raped her, but Price ignored this and continued collaborating with Weinstein.

Price later resigned from his post following sexual harassment allegations against him.

Since 2017, more than 80 women have accused him of sexual misconduct dating back decades.

Weinstein has denied all the allegations, saying any sexual encounters he had were consensual.

Above: Weinstein (left) and his chief council Arthur Aidala (right)

One of his lawyers, Arthur Aidala, filed a motion on Wednesday (8 January) urging Burke to recuse himself.

As evidence of juicidal bias, Aidala cited a comment Burke made Tuesday (7 January) when he threatened to revoke Weinstein’s bail after catching him using his cellphone in court.

“Is this really the way you want to end up in jail for the rest of your life, by texting and violating a court order?“, the judge said at the time.

Burke on Thursday said that even if the comments were “hyperbolic“, they were not evidence of prejudice.

“I certainly never actually meant that I was going to put your client in jail for life, nor did I mean, because I have not, that I have prejudged whether he is guilty or innocent of the charges“, the judge said.

Burke also denied Aidala’s request to delay the trial for a “cooling off period“.

This article grabbed my attention during the events of Canada Slim and the Napanee Sadness and recaptured it this morning, not for the justification of Weinstein’s trial.

Weinstein – if what is said about him is true – is a womanizer who used his powerful role in Hollywood to obtain sex from reluctant actresses, and if the case against him proved his culpability, then his imprisonment is justified.

Certainly I feel great sorrow for his victims and great revulsion for this man who further besmirches the reputation of other members of his shared gender.

What grabs my attention here is Weinstein’s use of his cellphone in court and Judge Burke’s reaction to this.

Weinstein on trial for sexual assault cannot resist his phone addiction long enough to respect the rules of the courtroom deciding his fate.

Burke’s reaction, though strong, is a reaction I can relate to, for phone addiction is something that enrages me as well (though rarely do I speak of it at the time I encounter it).

Weinstein’s use of his phone during his trial despite the prohibition from having one in the courtroom shows a man addicted.

Burke’s reaction says to me that he was thinking that Weinstein’s need to use his phone was more important to him than the reason why Burke was presiding over a courtroom to decide the mogul’s fate.

And frankly Weinstein’s attitude was insulting.

I have sat with friends and family who will spend more time on their phones than devote attention to the conversation in session.

I know they mean me no disrespect, but frankly there are moments I feel insulted.

In moments like these my self-respect asks:

“Am I not important enough for your full attention?“

I see the phone addicts congregate in buses and trains.

Certainly we could argue that regular commuters have seen their routes before, so why look up from their phones?

But it has been my experience that everything is in a state of constant flux much in the manner that you cannot step in the same river twice.

Every journey to and from St. Gallen, a journey that I have made hundreds of times in the past decade, is a familiar one.

And yet, without exception, each time that I consciously decide to pay attention to what is rolling past my wagon window I see something different, something remarkable.

Unusual animals, unusual people, unusual weather.

Beauty in the commonplace and the realization that there is nothing common about a place if one is observant.

As Sherlock Holmes once said to his faithful friend Dr. Watson:

“You see, but you do not observe.“

Above: Dr. John Watson and Sherlock Holmes

I find myself quietly furious when I walk in the wilderness and see folks using their phones, eyes cast down to screens, blind to the beauty that surrounds them.

It is their right to use their phones as they choose, when they choose, and how they choose to use them.

But you can love people and still hate the choices they make.

I accept that many people use their phones as digital cameras.

But the need of so many to document every moment of their lives with photos of themselves makes me weary.

Vain people are insufferable enough as they are without our being constantly exposed to their smug faces every time they decide to post something on social media.

I understand how important communication with the outside world is, but is it really necessary to be online every moment of our lives?

Must we always be “connected“?

You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht.
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye.
Your scarf, it was apricot.
You had one eye in the mirror as you watched yourself gavotte.
And all the girls dreamed that they’d be your partner.
They’d be your partner and

You’re so vain.
You probably think this song is about you.

You’re so vain (you’re so vain).
I bet you think this song is about you.
Don’t you? Don’t you?

You had me several years ago when I was still quite naive.
Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair and that you would never leave.
But you gave away the things you loved
And one of them was me.
I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee, clouds in my coffee, and
You’re so vain.

You probably think this song is about you.
You’re so vain, (you’re so vain).

I bet you think this song is about you.
Don’t you? Don’t you? Don’t you?
I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee, clouds in my coffee, and

You’re so vain.
You probably think this song is about you.

You’re so vain (you’re so vain)
I bet you think this song is about you.
Don’t you? Don’t you?

Well, I hear you went up to Saratoga
And your horse naturally won.
Then you flew your Lear Jet up to Nova Scotia.
To see the total eclipse of the sun.

Well, you’re where you should be all the time
And when you’re not, you’re with some underworld spy
Or the wife of a close friend, wife of a close friend, and

You’re so vain.
You probably think this song is about you.
You’re so vain (so vain).
I bet you think this song is about you.
Don’t you? Don’t you? Don’t you?

You’re so vain.
You probably think this song is about you.
You’re so vain.
Probably think this song about you.

While a smartphone, tablet, or computer can be a hugely productive tool, compulsive use of these devices can interfere with work, school, and relationships.

When you spend more time on social media or playing games than you do interacting with real people, or you can’t stop yourself from repeatedly checking texts, emails, or apps — even when it has negative consequences in your life — it may be time to reassess your technology use.

Smartphone addiction, sometimes colloquially known as “nomophobia” (fear of being without a mobile phone), is often fueled by an Internet overuse problem or Internet addiction disorder.

After all, it’s rarely the phone or tablet itself that creates the compulsion, but rather the games, apps and online worlds it connects us to.

Smartphone addiction can encompass a variety of impulse-control problems, including:

Virtual relationships: 

Addiction to social networking, dating apps, texting, and messaging can extend to the point where virtual, online friends become more important than real-life relationships.

We have all seen the couples sitting together in a restaurant ignoring each other and engaging with their smartphones instead.

While the Internet can be a great place to meet new people, reconnect with old friends, or even start romantic relationships, online relationships are not a healthy substitute for real-life interactions.

Online friendships can be appealing as they tend to exist in a bubble, not subject to the same demands or stresses as messy, real-world relationships.

Compulsive use of dating apps can change your focus to short-term hookups instead of developing long-term relationships.

Information overload: 

Compulsive web surfing, watching videos, playing games, or checking news feeds can lead to lower productivity at work or school and isolate you for hours at a time.

Compulsive use of the Internet and smartphone apps can cause you to neglect other aspects of your life, from real-world relationships to hobbies and social pursuits.

Cybersex addiction: 

Compulsive use of Internet pornography, sexting, nude-swapping, or adult messaging services can impact negatively on your real-life intimate relationships and overall emotional health.

While online pornography and cybersex addictions are types of sexual addiction, the Internet makes it more accessible, relatively anonymous, and very convenient.

It’s easy to spend hours engaging in fantasies impossible in real life.

Excessive use of dating apps that facilitate casual sex can make it more difficult to develop long-term intimate relationships or damage an existing relationship.

Online compulsions, such as gaming, gambling, stock trading, online shopping, or bidding on auction sites like eBay can often lead to financial and job-related problems.

While gambling addiction has been a well-documented problem for years, the availability of Internet gambling has made gambling far more accessible.

Compulsive stock trading or online shopping can be just as financially and socially damaging.

eBay addicts may wake up at strange hours in order to be online for the last remaining minutes of an auction.

You may purchase things you don’t need and can’t afford just to experience the excitement of placing the winning bid.

While you can experience impulse-control problems with a laptop or desktop computer, the size and convenience of smartphones and tablets means that we can take them just about anywhere and gratify our compulsions at any time.

In fact, most of us are rarely ever more than five feet from our smartphones.

Like the use of drugs and alcohol, they can trigger the release of the brain chemical dopamine and alter your mood.

You can also rapidly build up tolerance so that it takes more and more time in front of these screens to derive the same pleasurable reward.

Heavy smartphone use can often be symptomatic of other underlying problems, such as stress, anxiety, depression or loneliness.

At the same time, it can also exacerbate these problems.

If you use your smartphone as a “security blanket” to relieve feelings of anxiety, loneliness, or awkwardness in social situations, for example, you will succeed only in cutting yourself off further from people around you.

Staring at your phone will deny you the face-to-face interactions that can help to meaningfully connect you to others, alleviate anxiety, and boost your mood.

In other words, the remedy you are choosing for your anxiety (engaging with your smartphone), is actually making your anxiety worse.

Smartphone or Internet addiction can also negatively impact your life by:

Increasing loneliness and depression: 

While it may seem that losing yourself online will temporarily make feelings such as loneliness, depression, and boredom evaporate into thin air, it can actually make you feel even worse.

A 2014 study found a correlation between high social media usage and depression and anxiety.

Users, especially teens, tend to compare themselves unfavorably with their peers on social media, promoting feelings of loneliness and depression.

Fueling anxiety: 

One researcher found that the mere presence of a phone in a work place tends to make people more anxious and perform poorly on given tasks.

The heavier a person’s phone use, the greater the anxiety they experienced.

Increasing stress: 

Using a smartphone for work often means work bleeds into your home and personal life.

You feel the pressure to always be on, never out of touch from work.

This need to continually check and respond to email can contribute to higher stress levels and even burnout.

Exacerbating attention deficit disorders: 

The constant stream of messages and information from a smartphone can overwhelm the brain and make it impossible to focus attention on any one thing for more than a few minutes without feeling compelled to move on to something else.

Diminishing your ability to concentrate and think deeply or creatively: 

The persistent buzz, ping or beep of your smartphone can distract you from important tasks, slow your work, and interrupt those quiet moments that are so crucial to creativity and problem solving.

Instead of ever being alone with our thoughts, we are now always online and connected.

Disturbing your sleep: 

Excessive smartphone use can disrupt your sleep, which can have a serious impact on your overall mental health.

It can impact your memory, affect your ability to think clearly, and reduce your cognitive and learning skills.

Encouraging self-absorption: 

A UK study found that people who spend a lot of time on social media are more likely to display negative personality traits such as narcissism.

Snapping endless selfies, posting all your thoughts or details about your life can create an unhealthy self-centeredness, distancing you from real-life relationships and making it harder to cope with stress.

There is no specific amount of time spent on your phone, or the frequency you check for updates, or the number of messages you send or receive that indicates an addiction or overuse problem.

Spending a lot of time connected to your phone only becomes a problem when it absorbs so much of your time it causes you to neglect your face-to-face relationships, your work, school, hobbies, or other important things in your life.

If you find yourself ignoring friends over lunch to read Facebook updates or compulsively checking your phone in while driving or during school lectures, then it is time to reassess your smartphone use and strike a healthier balance in your life.

Warning signs of smartphone or Internet overuse include:

Trouble completing tasks at work or home:

Do you find laundry piling up and little food in the house for dinner because you’ve been busy chatting online, texting, or playing video games?

Perhaps you find yourself working late more often because you can’t complete your work on time.

Isolation from family and friends:

Is your social life suffering because of all the time you spend on your phone or other device?

If you’re in a meeting or chatting with friends, do you lose track of what’s being said because you’re checking your phone?

Have friends and family expressed concern about the amount of time you spend on your phone?

Do you feel like no one in your “real” life—even your spouse—understands you like your online friends?

Concealing your smartphone use:

Do you sneak off to a quiet place to use your phone?

Do you hide your smartphone use or lie to your boss and family about the amount of time you spend online?

Do you get irritated or cranky if your online time is interrupted?

Having a “fear of missing out” (or FOMO):

Do you hate to feel out of the loop or think you’re missing out on important news or information if you don’t check you phone regularly?

Do you need to compulsively check social media because you are anxious that others are having a better time, or leading a more exciting life than you?

Do you get up at night to check your phone?

Feeling of dread, anxiety, or panic if you leave your smartphone at home, the battery runs down or the operating system crashes.

Or do you feel phantom vibrations — you think your phone has vibrated but when you check, there are no new messages or updates?

A common warning sign of smartphone or Internet addiction is experiencing withdrawal symptoms when you try to cut back on your smartphone use.

These may include:

• Restlessness
• Anger or irritability
• Difficulty concentrating
• Sleep problems
• Craving access to your smartphone or other device

There are a number of steps you can take to get your smartphone and Internet use under control.

While you can initiate many of these measures yourself, an addiction is hard to beat on your own, especially when temptation is always within easy reach.

It can be all too easy to slip back into old patterns of usage.

Look for outside support, whether it is from family, friends, or a professional therapist.

To help you identify your problem areas, keep a log of when and how much you use your smartphone for non-work or non-essential activities.

There are specific apps that can help with this, enabling you to track the time you spend on your phone.

Are there times of day that you use your phone more?

Are there other things you could be doing instead?

The more you understand your smartphone use, the easier it will be to curb your habits and regain control of your time.

Recognize the triggers that make you reach for your phone: 

Is it when you’re lonely or bored?

If you are struggling with depression, stress, or anxiety, for example, your excessive smartphone use might be a way to self-soothe rocky moods.

Instead, find healthier and more effective ways of managing your moods, such as practicing relaxation techniques.

Understand the difference between interacting in-person and online: 

Human beings are social creatures.

We are not meant to be isolated or to rely on technology for human interaction.

Socially interacting with another person face-to-face — making eye contact, responding to body language —can make you feel calm, safe, and understood, and quickly put the brakes on stress.

Interacting through text, email or messaging bypasses these nonverbal cues so won’t have the same effect on your emotional well-being.

Besides, online friends can’t hug you when a crisis hits, visit you when you’re sick, or celebrate a happy occasion with you.

Build your coping skills: 

Perhaps tweeting, texting or blogging is your way of coping with stress or anger.

Or maybe you have trouble relating to others and find it easier to communicate with people online.

Building skills in these areas will help you weather the stresses and strains of daily life without relying on your smartphone.

Recognize any underlying problems that may support your compulsive behavior: 

Have you had problems with alcohol or drugs in the past?

Does anything about your smartphone use remind you of how you used to drink or use drugs to numb or distract yourself?

Strengthen your support network: 

Set aside dedicated time each week for friends and family.

If you are shy, there are ways to overcome social awkwardness and make lasting friends without relying on social media or the Internet.

To find people with similar interests, try reaching out to colleagues at work, joining a sports team or book club, enrolling in an education class, or volunteering for a good cause.

You will be able to interact with others like you, let relationships develop naturally, and form friendships that will enhance your life and strengthen your health.

For most people, getting control over their smartphone and Internet use isn’t a case of quitting cold turkey.

Think of it more like going on a diet.

Just as you still need to eat, you probably still need to use your phone for work, school, or to stay in touch with friends.

Your goal should be to cut back to more healthy levels of use.

Set goals for when you can use your smartphone: 

For example, you might schedule use for certain times of day, or you could reward yourself with a certain amount of time on your phone once you’ve completed a homework assignment or finished a chore, for instance.

Turn off your phone at certain times of the day, such as when you’re driving, in a meeting, at the gym, having dinner, or playing with your kids.

Don’t take your phone with you to the bathroom.

Don’t bring your phone or tablet to bed:

The blue light emitted by the screens can disrupt your sleep if used within two hours of bedtime.

Turn devices off and leave them in another room overnight to charge.

Instead of reading eBooks on your phone or tablet at night, pick up a book.

You’ll not only sleep better but research shows you’ll also remember more of what you’ve read.

Replace your smartphone use with healthier activities: 

If you are bored and lonely, resisting the urge to use your smartphone can be very difficult.

Have a plan for other ways to fill the time, such as meditating, reading a book, or chatting with friends in person.

Play the “phone stack” game: 

Spending time with other smartphone addicts?

Play the “phone stack” game.

When you are having lunch, dinner, or drinks together, have everyone place their smartphones face down on the table.

Even as the phones buzz and beep, no one is allowed to grab their device.

If someone can’t resist checking their phone, that person has to pick up the check for everyone.

Remove social media apps from your phone so you can only check Facebook, Twitter and the like from your computer.

And remember:

What you see of others on social media is rarely an accurate reflection of their lives — people exaggerate the positive aspects of their lives, brushing over the doubts and disappointments that we all experience.

Spending less time comparing yourself unfavorably to these stylized representations can help to boost your mood and sense of self-worth.

Limit checks. 

If you compulsively check your phone every few minutes, wean yourself off by limiting your checks to once every 15 minutes.

Then once every 30 minutes, then once an hour.

If you need help, there are apps that can automatically limit when you are able to access your phone.

Curb your fear of missing out. 

Accept that by limiting your smartphone use, you are likely going to miss out on certain invitations, breaking news, or new gossip.

There is so much information available on the Internet, it is almost impossible to stay on top of everything, anyway.

Accepting this can be liberating and help break your reliance on technology.

Look Up

I have 422 friends, yet I am lonely.
I speak to all of them everyday, yet none of them really know me.

The problem I have sits in the spaces between,
Looking into their eyes or at a name on a screen.

I took a step back and opened my eyes,
I looked around and then realised
That this media we call “social” is anything but
When we open our computers, it’s our doors we shut.

All this technology we have, it’s just an illusion,
Of community, companionship, a sense of inclusion
Yet when you step away from this device of delusion,
You awaken to see a world of confusion.

A world where we’re slaves to the technology we mastered,
Where our information gets sold by some rich greedy bastard.
A world of self-interest, self-image, self-promotion,
Where we share all our best bits, but leave out the emotion.

We are at our most happy with an experience we share,
But is it the same if no one is there?
Be there for your friends and they’ll be there too,
But no one will be if a group message will do.

We edit and exaggerate, we crave adulation,
We pretend we don’t notice the social isolation.
We put our words into order until our lives are glistening,
We don’t even know if anyone is listening.

Being alone isn’t the problem, let me just emphasize,
That if you read a book, paint a picture, or do some exercise,
You are being productive and present, not reserved or recluse,
You’re being awake and attentive, putting your time to good use.

So when you’re in public and you start to feel alone,
Put your hands behind your head and step away from the phone.
You don’t need to stare at your menu or at your contact list,
Just talk to one another and learn to co-exist.

I can’t stand to hear the silence of a busy commuter train,
When no one wants to talk through the fear of looking insane.
We’re becoming unsocial, it no longer satisfies
To engage with one another and look into someone’s eyes.

We’re surrounded by children, who since they were born,
Watch us living like robots, and think it’s the norm.
It’s not very likely you will make world’s greatest dad,
If you can’t entertain a child without using an iPad.

When I was a child, I would never be home,
I’d be out with my friends, on our bikes we would roam.
We’d wear holes in our trainers and graze up our knees.
We’d build our own clubhouse, high up in the trees.

Now the parks are so quiet, it gives me a chill
To see no children outside and the swings hanging still.
There’s no skipping or hopscotch, no church and no steeple,
We’re a generation of idiots, smart phones and dumb people.

So look up from your phone, shut down that display,
Take in your surroundings, and make the most of today.
Just one real connection is all it can take,
To show you the difference that being there can make.

Be there in the moment when she gives you the look,
That you remember forever as when love overtook.
The time you first hold her hand or first kiss her lips,
The time you first disagree but still love her to bits.

The time you don’t need to tell hundreds about what you’ve just done,
Because you want to share the moment with just this one.
The time you sell your computer so you can buy a ring,
For the girl of your dreams who is now the real thing.

The time you want to start a family and the moment when
You first hold your baby girl and get to fall in love again.
The time she keeps you up at night and all you want is rest,
And the time you wipe away the tears as your baby flees the nest.

The time your little girl returns with a boy for you to hold,
And the day he calls you granddad and makes you feel real old
The time you take in all you’ve made, just by giving life attention,
And how you’re glad you didn’t waste it by looking down at some invention.

The time you hold your wife’s hand and sit down beside her bed
You tell her that you love her and lay a kiss upon her head.
She then whispers to you quietly, as her heart gives a final beat,
That she’s lucky she got stopped by that lost boy in the street.

But none of these times ever happened, you never had any of this,
When you’re too busy looking down, you don’t see the chances you miss.

So look up from your phone, shut down those displays,
We have a finite existence, a set number of days.
Why waste all our time getting caught in the net,

When the end comes, nothing’s worse than regret.

I am guilty too of being part of this machine,
This digital world where we are heard but not seen.
Where we type and don’t talk, where we read as we chat,
Where we spend hours together without making eye contact.

Don’t give into a life where you follow the hype,
Give people your love, don’t give them your “like”.
Disconnect from the need to be heard and defined.
Go out into the world, leave distractions behind.

Look up from your phone, shut down that display,
Stop reading this screen, live life the real way.

Sources: Wikipedia / Google / Brendan Pierson, “Judge rejects lawyer’s accusation of bias“, Kingston Whig-Standard, 10 January 2020 / Gary Turk, “Look Up”